She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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