oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I am available for nakedness
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
