one two three fourrrrnication!
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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