my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
