omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
