let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
