Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Holy sore nipples Batman
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize