Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
