oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
it's like heaven, but drunker
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
