can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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