Tell her she can't have a vagina
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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