The maid of honor just puked.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
