If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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