I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
