some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
