After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
