My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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