so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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