I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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