Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I have so many feelings about this burrito
is that a dick in a sweater?
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