eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Just high enough for therapy.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
