I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
