Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Randomize
