My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize