I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
