You work out of a Hotel?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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