I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize