I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
