U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
