Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
