Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Randomize