Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize