You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Randomize
