My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Is it penis luge time yet?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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