I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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