:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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