Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
