Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
last night I used snow as a chaser
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
