I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize