real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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