let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
