"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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