I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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