mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
