Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
