The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
