your room smells of hookers.
And success
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
