Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
