Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
She said her name was "party"
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
The air taste purple.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
