Porn is love you can see.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
