If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
