yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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